Today felt unnaturally long.
Work was wearing me down and I was glad I decided to put some smokes in my bag this morning.
Got to the library, sat under a tree and relaxed. It started to rain, but not hard enough to send me inside. Eventually Ben showed up and I told him I didn’t have the energy to go food shopping like we had planned. This was fine with him and he said we’d go tomorrow.
We picked up dinner (kinda think we’re doing that too much lately but I also kinda don’t care) and now Ben is downloading a few games he wants me to try.
Hoping tonight feels as long as today did.
Saw Jen yesterday, she asked what the likelihood of us moving out of state would be. She was taking a poll.
I think about it all the time, not just leaving the state but leaving the country. But thinking about it isn’t the same as actually doing it and unless Ben finds a ridiculously amazing job elsewhere, we’re staying put.
Sometimes I think heading out to California would be cool but there’s no difference in the cost of living over there from what it is here in New York. Why uproot ourselves from our family and friends to go somewhere else and struggle alone?
We could move down south where things are cheaper, but it’s the south so NO. I can’t deal with republicans, bibles, guns, or NASCAR and I don’t want to give up winter.
So Long Island it is.
Protesters use umbrellas to protect themselves from tear gas at Hong Kong’s Occupy Central.
A rare moment of non-evil.
We took a walk this morning to Ben’s parents. We owed his dad some money. He tried to turn it down but we didn’t feel right about it and eventually he took it. His sister was visiting for the weekend so we hung around for a little bit.
We had talked about going to see a movie or checking out the Long Island Fair but laziness won out and we ended up just going home to crap out on the couch.
I took a nap and woke up cranky and hungry. Have I mentioned I’m a giant baby? Ben took care of dinner because he’s awesome, we finished playing Diablo, the ending was meh but it was fun playing together. We started Far Cry3, Ben figured i’d like it because at one point you have to escape through a marijuana field.
Currently waiting for Getting Doug With High to air, wishing it wasn’t Sunday night because I’m never ready for Monday.
At least it was a good weekend.
Researchers have found that distraction is the antagonist of attention, not its opposite. It’s an interesting distinction. Distraction is the devil in your ear — not always the result of an attention deficit, but borne of our own desires. We are distracted because we want to be.– This altogether pause-giving New York Times piece about what actually happens when we text and drive offers a poignant reminder that “attention is an intentional, unapologetic discriminator [which] asks what is relevant right now, and gears us up to notice only that.” (via explore-blog)
- Ben and I were both in bed by 10:30 last night, this is why I’m up now
- spent most of the day at Joe and Erica’s for their daughter’s 2nd birthday.
- anxiety was up when I initially arrived, I don’t always do well with large gatherings (even when it’s people I like!) I had pointless shit on my mind and I was solo because Ben had to work. I really hate when he’s not around, and sometimes I’m a baby about it.
- Joe gave me a shot of tequila.
-it helped, so did the beer
- at one point Erica’s grandmother patted my stomach and told me I “needed a baby in there”, which I thought was pretty funny, but later on I felt kinda sad about it (oversensitive?) I’d have one in there if I could.
- it was later explained to me that she meant it as a compliment. she had been watching me hold one of the other babies at the party and thought I was a “natural”. Old people say the darnedest things.
- while there, I got a message from Jen that she had found my camera at the office. She is the best person ever.
- Ben arrived as things were winding down and the remaining tightness in my chest disappeared as soon as he hugged me.
- I’m a baby.
- went home for some much needed snuggly time, after, we picked up dinner and tried to watch a movie but I was too fucking tired and we ended up just going to bed.
- which is why I’m up now.
- goodnight and good morning.
Ben is working today so Grandpa is settling for me, his second favorite human :)
I had to bring my camera into work with me. The other day an order came in and there was a discrepancy between the coding on the parts and the coding on the paperwork, and before our supplier would send us a new set of documents, we needed to provide them with a picture of the code on the parts.
I didn’t think this would be an issue until I went into the warehouse to look at the parts and found that they were these tiny pieces of nothing, you could barely see the numbers on them but they definitely didn’t match. I tried several times to get a decent picture with my phone but it was too small to get a clear shot.
So I brought my camera in today and got it done. The only problem now is that I didn’t bring my camera home with me and I was positive I had left the building with it, however after tearing up our car and the apartment, I have decided that only two options are possible.
1. I left my camera on my desk-I hope it’s this one-
or 2. I took the camera off my desk, and I placed it down in the parking lot while I was waiting for Ben and I was so scattered that when he pulled up I didn’t remember to pick it back up again and in that case it’s most likely gone. And the more I think about it, the more I think that this is what happened.
A part of me wants to cry and possibly vomit (it was my 30th birthday gift and I doubt I can afford to replace it anytime soon) and another part of me doesn’t care because I know there’s nothing I can do about it until Monday anyway and there’s no point wasting 2 wonderful days of not working by stressing out about it and it’s just a camera, blah blah blah.
But it’s also my camera and it has sentimental value and I loved using it.
Please be on the desk.
Alan Watts on hurrying vs. timing
The North American Cryptid Map
A comprehensive guide to the whereabouts of (possibly fake) real monsters.
But where’s the Montauk Monster??
Just so we’re all clear.